I remember the first time I experienced burnout as a mom. I was running on very little sleep, trying to figure out how to be a mom for the first time. I struggled to make even an ounce of milk and thought to myself, “Isn’t this supposed to just happen naturally?” On top of that, what used to be simple tasks—like cooking a meal—suddenly felt like climbing Mount Everest. I found myself sinking deeper into this dark hole. One day, something clicked. I realized I was experiencing mom burnout. Slowly, I started making changes that helped me overcome this phase of my life, and I want to share those with you today.
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What is Mom Burnout?
Mom burnout is an overwhelming state of physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion that happens when the demands of motherhood, household responsibilities, and daily life become too much. It’s common among stay-at-home moms, but it can affect any mom juggling too many things. Symptoms might include feeling drained, irritable, and detached from your role as a caregiver. If this sounds familiar, know that you’re not alone.
Why Do Moms Burn Out?
There are countless reasons why moms experience burnout. Constantly being touched, hearing “Mom!” a thousand times a day, keeping up with an endless to-do list, and comparing yourself to other moms on social media who seem to do it all with ease—it can all add up. You might have a partner who doesn’t fully understand the pressure you’re under, and, to top it off, you’re trying to rediscover yourself in your nonexistent free time. It’s a recipe for burnout.
Symptoms of Mom Burnout
Some common signs of mom burnout include:
- Irritability: Snapping at your kids or partner over small things.
- Exhaustion: Feeling tired even after a full night’s sleep (if you’re lucky enough to get one).
- Disconnection: Not feeling like yourself or disengaged from your kids.
- Mental fog: Having trouble concentrating or remembering things.
- Resentment: Feeling angry or resentful toward your role as a mom or partner.
How to Overcome Mom Burnout
Recognizing mom burnout is the first step toward overcoming it. You’re not going to wake up one day and magically feel better. But if you start taking small steps, 1% at a time, you’ll notice a difference. Here are some strategies that worked for me:
1. Journaling
Journaling is a powerful way to reflect on your day and identify triggers. Keep it simple—jot down a few thoughts before bed or in the morning. Write about how you felt that day, what contributed to your burnout, and how you’d like to feel instead. In her book The Well-Lived Life, Dr. Gladys McGeary talks about finding your “juice”—those things that light you up. Journaling can help you discover and prioritize those things in your life.
2. Make a Healthy Meal
Sometimes all you want is cheesy pizza, and that’s okay! But if you’re constantly feeling run down, your body might be asking for nutrient-dense foods. Here are some easy, healthy meal ideas that won’t add stress:
- Avocado toast with a runny egg and everything bagel seasoning.
- Fruit smoothie with spinach, Greek yogurt, and flax seeds.
- Hearty vegetable soup with sourdough bread for dunking.
- Colorful salad with chicken, berries, nuts, and feta.
- Tuna salad with pita crackers and carrots.
You could also try incorporating a multivitamin into your daily routine. I’m no doctor, but I found that this one really improved my energy levels. Of course, ask your PCP for suggestions on what would work best for you.
3. Get Dressed
Getting dressed in something that makes you feel good can work wonders for your mood. Even if it’s just comfy athletic wear, taking a few minutes to put yourself together can lift your spirits. For more tips, check out my 15-minute get-ready routine.
4. Talk to a Friend or Family Member
Sometimes, all you need is a good conversation with someone who understands. Call your mom, best friend, or partner and share what’s on your mind. You’ll feel supported, and who knows—they might even offer to watch the kids for a while so you can take a break.
5. Find Support
Whether it’s from your spouse, a local mom group, or a licensed therapist, reaching out for support can be a game-changer. If you’re not ready to talk to a professional, there are also great online communities where moms lift each other up. I am personally a member of the Stay at Home Mom Life group on Facebook and find it to be a very uplifting and supportive place!
6. Establish a Daily Routine
A daily routine can be a game-changer for overcoming mom burnout. It adds structure and predictability to your day, reducing stress. In my post, How to Create a Realistic Stay-at-Home Mom Routine, I share simple steps to get started:
- Focus on Key Moments: Start by streamlining hectic parts of your day, like mornings. For tips, check out my post on Streamlining Your Morning Routine.
- Anchor Points: Build your routine around key tasks like meals and naps to create a natural flow for your day.
- Stay Flexible: Life with kids can be unpredictable—don’t stress if things don’t go perfectly. Adjust as needed and give yourself grace.
- Prioritize “Me Time”: Even a few minutes for yourself can make a difference. Include small breaks in your routine to recharge.
7. Get Moving
Moving your body, even if it’s just for five minutes, can help. Set a timer and have a mini dance party with your kids—or by yourself! If dancing isn’t your thing, try some quick stretches or jumping jacks to get your blood flowing. If you can manage to carve out 20 minutes or so, you can check out my favorite at-home workouts here.
8. Find a Hobby
One of the best ways to combat mom burnout is by finding a hobby that engages your mind and brings you joy. When you immerse yourself in something that challenges your brain, it can do wonders for pulling you out of a rut. Hobbies help you get into a state of flow—that magical place where time seems to fly, and your mind feels at ease. Whether it’s crafting, gardening, or learning something new, having an activity that’s just for you can be a powerful form of self-care.
If you’re not sure where to start, check out my post on 60 Free and Inexpensive Hobbies to Start. You’ll find plenty of ideas to get your creative juices flowing without breaking the bank. Finding a hobby can be just the thing you need to recharge and rediscover what lights you up.
9. Get Some Sunshine
Step outside, take a deep breath, and go for a walk. Notice the leaves on the trees and the ants on the ground. Maybe your kids are with you when you do it. Pay attention to what they see. That IS a really cool rock on the ground! Pick it up, feel it, and maybe put it in your pocket to save. Put it on the kitchen windowsill to remember while doing the dishes… again. Small moments like these can help ground you.
For more tips on staying present and mindful, check out my post on Mindfulness Tips for Moms. It’s full of easy, practical ways to incorporate mindfulness into your daily routine, even if you’re short on time. Just a few minutes of fresh air and presence can make a huge difference in your day.
10. Let It Go
It’s okay to let go of the idea of being perfect. Instead of stressing over a spotless house, invite a friend over for lunch and don’t worry about the mess. Chances are, they’ll appreciate seeing your home in the same state as theirs.
How to Explain Mom Burnout to Your Husband
Explaining mom burnout to your husband or loved ones can be difficult, but communication is key. Be open and honest about what you’re feeling, and avoid pointing fingers or placing blame, as this can lead to defensiveness. If conversations feel strained, it might be helpful to seek a couples counselor for added support.
What If Burnout Persists?
If your burnout persists, it might be time to talk to your doctor. Sometimes, what feels like burnout is actually clinical depression, and a medical professional can help you determine the best path forward.
Preventing Mom Burnout Moving Forward
There will always be hard days, but you can learn to catch the signs of burnout early. Build small moments of joy and relaxation into your routine and try not to overcommit. Remember to find the silver lining where you can, and don’t be too hard on yourself.
Remember, You Are Normal
It’s completely normal to grieve your old life before motherhood. It’s normal to want time to yourself and to want to feel like you again. You are doing a great job.
Summary
I’ve started incorporating these practices into my own life, and while it didn’t happen overnight, one day I looked up and realized I was out of the burnout fog. I can honestly say I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, and I want that for you, too.
Burnout doesn’t go away with a single change—it’s a process of recognizing what’s draining you and finding ways to recharge. Whether it’s through journaling, eating healthier, getting outside, or simply talking to a friend, small steps can lead to big changes over time. The key is to give yourself grace and realize that you don’t have to do everything all at once.
Remember, feeling burnt out as a mom doesn’t mean you’re failing. You’re human, and motherhood is hard. Take it one day at a time, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support when you need it. Most importantly, trust that with patience and self-compassion, you will feel better. You’re already doing the most important job in the world, and you deserve the same care and kindness you give to others every day.
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XRstone says
Hello.
Good cheer to all on this beautiful day!!!!!
Good luck 🙂